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floridabreze Bookworm  Posts: 1122 Registered: Jul 2007 |
Posted July 27th, 2011 11:27 AM IP  Ok, so I told my daughter what a period is and all but neither of us were very prepared when she came and told me yesterday that she is bleeding! 
So far, it's just been really light and I am hoping it stays that way.
On the way home from VBS last night, it was just her and I, so I told her a little more about having a period and how you can feel and that this is a monthly occurrence (something I had obviously forgot to tell her before!!) She said, "Mom, can we talk about something else, I'm starting to feel kind of sick!" I think maybe it was her nerves and trying to let all this new info sink in.
Before bed, she was about in tears again. She said "Mom, I feel like I am growing up so fast." My heart was about breaking for her.
Does anyone have any advice or input on how to help a young girl through this time?
I was the 5th of 6 girls, so I had older sisters to talk to and "see" how things were done. Tamara does not have that advantage and she is older than all her friends at church, so she really doesn't have anyone her age to talk to.
*sigh* ~Twila Henry
Married to my best friend, Dan
Mother to two blessings, Danny Jr. (14) and Tamara Quinn (12)
http://danhenryfamily.blogspot.com/
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mom_4 Bookworm Posts: 825 Registered: Jan 2008 |
Posted July 27th, 2011 12:07 PM IP  My advice is not to overwhelm with so many facts, or too much info.
I was 9 and the way my mom said it I now was a lady and made it so horrible I remember I wanted to die I was so angry.
Empathize with her, let her initiate the convetsation as far as details with a few simple pointed questions.
Somehow find a way to celebrate and make it special! I know that might sound odd...my girls were 11. They didn't get one every month at first. If they felt sick, I let them have a day of leisure, when they were first starting especially.
I took my girls for ice cream or chocolate
I hated the things my mom made me wear so it was VERY important to me to get something my girls were comfortable with, even if it cost more.
I was so glad my girls were at least 11, but my heart still sank that they have to be faced with hormones and all that go with it at such a young age.
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cherrycreek Bookworm Posts: 364 Registered: Aug 2008 |
Posted July 27th, 2011 12:38 PM IP  Ugh, I'm also all ears! My oldest daughter just turned 11 and no period yet. I'm so hoping it doesn't show up for awhile. She always has had mood swings and I can.not. imagine what this will be like.
mom_4, I have to remember what you said. I'm so afraid my daughter will panic (she panics over everything else!) and want to make this as easy for her as possible.
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esther_lynn Bookworm  Posts: 1119 Registered: Mar 2007 |
Posted July 27th, 2011 01:18 PM IP  My daughter is going to be 9 this fall, and it just struck me the other day that I really need to start preparing her for this. I think I was 11. My mom was not living so my older sister clued me in. So I am listening... Esther
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Jaysgirl Bookworm  Posts: 1587 Registered: Aug 2008 |
Posted July 27th, 2011 02:50 PM IP  My daughter is 11 and she just started since her birthday. I had been able to talk about it before hand as I was seeing signs but it still kind of shocks me at how young she is! I think I was 13 at least! She has adapted well though. I also made the adult motrin available. I figured if she was old enough for cramps she is old enough for the adult pain reliever too! Sylvia - mom to five - Ana-13, Adria-9, Jacob-6, Caleb-2, Isaac-1
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Jenn Bookworm  Posts: 1494 Registered: Mar 2008 |
Posted July 28th, 2011 09:08 AM IP  I got mine really young and had some embarrassing episodes of leaking because I didn't know how often to change pads, etc. I think my mom was a little embarrassed to talk too much about it . . . can't really blame her, but it would have been nice to have been told some practical things about how to handle the bleeding before it leaked all over in public! Jenn
wife to Gabriel, mommy to Morgan (in heaven), Bronwyn and Gregory
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rachi882 Bookworm  Posts: 2590 Registered: Jun 2007 |
Posted July 28th, 2011 09:28 AM IP  It makes me sad to think that my six year old could be getting here period in 5 years! I want her to be a little girl for a loooong time! Rachal
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natover Bookworm  Posts: 922 Registered: Jul 2007 |
Posted July 28th, 2011 09:39 AM IP  Does she like to read? Maybe you could get her one of those books for girls & let her read it & tell her if she has any questions that you will be glad to answer them for her. That way she could read it in private and would have time to let it sink in & not overwhelm her so much. Just a thought....Or if she would rather maybe ya'll could read it together. Wife of Micah ~
Mother of 4 beautiful children~
Olivia Kate ~ Aug. 3, 2006
Emily Sophia ~ Sept. 11, 2008 - Jan. 20, 2009
Wyatt Caleb ~ Feb. 25, 2010
Lincoln Matthew ~ April 6, 2012
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floridabreze Bookworm  Posts: 1122 Registered: Jul 2007 |
Posted July 28th, 2011 09:41 AM IP  Natalie, do you have a specific book in mind? ~Twila Henry
Married to my best friend, Dan
Mother to two blessings, Danny Jr. (14) and Tamara Quinn (12)
http://danhenryfamily.blogspot.com/
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natover Bookworm  Posts: 922 Registered: Jul 2007 |
Posted July 28th, 2011 09:47 AM IP  Not really, I just know there are several series of books out there. I think the one is a set that you use the first book to prepare them & then once they get it, there is another book & then when they are older there is a book about s*x & stuff that you can use to help explain it. You could maybe check Amazon or google something & see what comes up. I think that would be so helpful cause I know how mixed up I can get when I try to explain something, especially when you want to say it right & it just doesn't come out the way you want it too. =) Wife of Micah ~
Mother of 4 beautiful children~
Olivia Kate ~ Aug. 3, 2006
Emily Sophia ~ Sept. 11, 2008 - Jan. 20, 2009
Wyatt Caleb ~ Feb. 25, 2010
Lincoln Matthew ~ April 6, 2012
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rallyjan Bookworm  Posts: 2767 Registered: Jun 2007 |
Posted July 28th, 2011 12:18 PM IP  In Jewish culture, beginning with periods is a time to celebrate becoming a woman. Guess I need to educate myself and change my own mindset, since my lack of knowledge made it a very scary, painful, and messy time of my life. I don't want my girls to go through what I did. Thankfully, that time is still far in the future, but time does have a way of moving on. Jan
Mama to Zachary, Leandra and Kandace
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lenni724 Bookworm  Posts: 1119 Registered: Jun 2007 |
Posted July 28th, 2011 12:45 PM IP  I am so thankful to my mom for explaining it to me before I got it, and not making a big deal out of it either - like it was some awful thing that I just have to deal with. I had a friend who knew nothing about it when she got hers and it scared her really bad. She thought she was going to die or something was dreadfully wrong with her.
My mom told us when we turned 10, but hearing how girls are getting them younger and younger, maybe the age should be lowered. I think I was 12 or 13 when I got mine.
One of the biggest things, like Jenn mentioned, is to try to help your daughter not have embarrassing things happen in public. And if it does when you are not with her - not to be scared to talk to another woman she knows to get help.(i.e. clean up, extra pads) Although I'm sure sometimes it might not be preventable. I know that one of the first times I had my period, I did not know yet how mine worked - how long to expect it too last, etc. On day 3 I had stopped bleeding so I stopped wearing a pad. It started up again while I was at school and I was so embarrassed. Thankfully, I had a very dark purple dress on and it didn't show much, but I was too shy or private or whatever to tell my teacher so I tried to hide it and wipe my desk seat off without anyone noticing. Always make sure she has extra pads with her at all times. Lanita ~
wife to Phil
mommy to
Ariana Beth (with Jesus) 7.11.07
Kaelin Rionna 12.18.08
Dyllon Zachary 8.29.10
Traimley Shaw 12.14.11
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cherrycreek Bookworm Posts: 364 Registered: Aug 2008 |
Posted July 28th, 2011 02:48 PM IP  Twila, I have a book or two I bought for my girls. When I get home tonight, I'll post the title/titles. Christianbook.com has different ones and I liked being able to see sample pages and read the reviews of what other moms thought.
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amyjane30 Bookworm  Posts: 960 Registered: Mar 2008 |
Posted July 28th, 2011 05:24 PM IP  What Jan said ^^^ That was how it was among the women and girls when I grew up. My older sisters were long married with littles and they knew on the day of my "growing up" and made sure they found a little private minute to celebrate this big thing in my life! My mom was matter of fact and went and found me what I needed. I guess being the younger set of girls in the family must have been a help....I knew what to expect from 7 yrs? old. It was an exciting day but of course the horrible painful yuckies came on quickly....I was 11. I was provided midol and sleep and a day to be sick too. Those first years are bad bad and ouchy.
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antrosari Bookworm  Posts: 1376 Registered: Aug 2008 |
Posted July 28th, 2011 11:36 PM IP  Oh dear, I hope my daughters have it as nice as I did when I started. No ouchies for me until later in life.
I know this experience is right around the corner in our home. My 9 yr old daughter's br*asts are filling out pretty good already, and I have talked to her about periods. She knows what to expect, but nothing we can say will prepare them for the day it really happens. Rose~Anthony's wife
Mom of five
Ariana Pearl~11
Serena Kaylee~9
Brielle Rose~7
Landon Joel~5
Amaya Nicole~6/16/2012
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floridabreze Bookworm  Posts: 1122 Registered: Jul 2007 |
Posted July 29th, 2011 07:46 AM IP  Yesterday seemed to be a better day for Tamara although her period was heavier. She seemed more her normal self!
We have VBS this week, so last night I put a couple pads in her drawstring purse and gave it to her to take along to church. I think she was glad I did that, because with this all being new she wasn't sure what to expect.
I had first told her about a period when she turned 9, so she knew what it was, but yes, nothing really prepares you for the real thing! :P
I've been letting her just take it easy around the house....sleeping in, not doing too much work, resting when necessary. So far, I don't think she has had cramps and I am hoping she will take after me in that. I never had bad cramps like some of my friends did. I remember them telling me they would roll on the floor in pain!!  ~Twila Henry
Married to my best friend, Dan
Mother to two blessings, Danny Jr. (14) and Tamara Quinn (12)
http://danhenryfamily.blogspot.com/
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richlyblest Librarian  Posts: 1399 Registered: Aug 2009 |
Posted July 29th, 2011 08:03 AM IP 
Quote: floridabreze wrote:
I remember them telling me they would roll on the floor in pain!! 
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I wasn't quite that bad, but unless I took lots of medication, I could hardly function. If I took no medication, I would throw up from the pain
I started just right before 11. Fortunately, I started out light with little pain, but it quickly grew worse. One piece of advice I would have is to teach her how to deal with a period starting away from home when you weren't prepared. In an emergency, a thick, wad of tp can stop you from leaking! Also, when you knows kind what your schedule is, you can wear a pad or liner if yolu suspect you could start bleeding away from home. Audrey ~ Kendall's wife, mom to Kierra and Emily, and Lauren (in heaven)
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natover Bookworm  Posts: 922 Registered: Jul 2007 |
Posted July 29th, 2011 09:41 AM IP  Def a good idea Audrey. ^^^^^ That can be a horrifying feeling. Another idea might be to get her a small calendar & mark the day she started & then have her figure ahead 28 (which is considered the normal amount of time I think) days & put a mark that way she has an idea of when it might come again rather than it being a surprise. it's amazing how fast 4 weeks can go. =) Plus it will help her get used to her schedule & figure out exactly how many days she goes in between. Wife of Micah ~
Mother of 4 beautiful children~
Olivia Kate ~ Aug. 3, 2006
Emily Sophia ~ Sept. 11, 2008 - Jan. 20, 2009
Wyatt Caleb ~ Feb. 25, 2010
Lincoln Matthew ~ April 6, 2012
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cherrycreek Bookworm Posts: 364 Registered: Aug 2008 |
Posted July 29th, 2011 01:32 PM IP  Twila, The book I have from Christianbook.com is called "The Body Book" from the Lily Series. I really like it for several reasons. Each chapter ends with talking to God about it complete with questions to answer and a journal page for girls to jot down their feelings. She uses alot of Bible verses and is very positive about this stage in life. This little book has lots of info on diet, exercise, PMS, how to be prepared away from home, etc, etc.
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mammaof5 Bookworm  Posts: 534 Registered: Oct 2010 |
Posted July 29th, 2011 05:08 PM IP  Twila, my daughter just turned 11 (although no period yet ), but we have a series of 4 books, its called "God's design for S*x" series, and we really like these books. I just went through the 3rd book with her, and it explains about getting your period, and numerous other things about s*x. I think the best approach is to just be open and talk about it and not act like it is something embarrassing. It is the way God made us. My family often knows when I have my period, so it is not a foreign thing to them. Susie wife to Ben, mom to Darren 14,
Cheyanne 12, Jared 10, Hannah 8,
Jacob 3 and Brooke newborn
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A Page in the Life of A Mom :: Chapters of Motherhood :: Elementary :: Periods |
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